Eighteenth Amendment

Eighteen months today. Year and a half.

Today began stormy with rain coming down in sheets. I arrived at the ortho's office to find no one, not a soul there. I have never been to his office when there weren't at least 3 people waiting in the waiting room, and each of the three chairs in the examination room filled. It was eerie, slow and quiet, and I had real individual attention. He put thicker wires on both the top and bottom teeth and was pleased with the way the upper molars are turning. He's intent on closing the gaps on the bottoms and let me tell you, in just a few hours, I can already feel and see a difference. He did concern me because he said that he'll need to widen out my top teeth, in order to accommodate the crossbite. This I found scary because I don't know exactly how that is to be achieved. The more I read about its treatment and the necessity of something called an "expander," the more I hope that my doctor can fix this without such a medieval torture device...

I did some research on crossbites and they say that it is often caused by people who have large tonsils and adenoids, who are forced to breathe through the mouth, rather than the nose as children. Fascinating! I've been told by every doctor who has ever looked in my throat that I have extraordinarily large tonsils, and this was the cause of yearly strep infections as a child. (Every time I see a new doctor they are shocked to find that they were not removed.) I suppose it is somewhat comforting to know where it comes from, but I'm feeling a little down. I had convinced myself that I would be done with this whole process in under two years. I was kind of specific, telling myself that 18 months would be the time that this will all end. Now, I'm going to have to make an amendment to that lucky number 18.

The Eighteenth Amendment to the Constitution is all about prohibiting the manufacture, sale and transportation of intoxicating liquors--and it was the only amendment to be fully repealed. Right now I could use a glass of intoxicating liquor to ease the disappointment of the repeal of the eighteenth expectation. An After Eighteen sounds like it would ease my childlike hope that all this would have been done by now. Chocolate milk with kahlua and creme de menthe? Yep, that sounds about right.

But then again, in Hebrew chai or חי is both the number eighteen and the word for life. And if I am to look on the bright side, (as I often convince myself to do within the confines of this blog) perhaps there is new life to be had in this eighteenth amendment. What I started thinking of the braces as my greatest strength, instead of my perceived greatest liability? What would happen if I merely started thinking, even for a day, for that to be the case? What sort of life would be birthed? How much wider would I smile?

What if you thought of your worst quality was actually your best? How would your life be different? Let me know, I'm curious.

Grinworthy Sentiments

I got the best compliment today!

I was emailing with a new contact that I met out in California two weeks ago and I told her about the blog. I'm usually a bit hesitant to mix my work world with my blog world, but the two seem to be melding in a very organic way lately. She wrote back, "You know what’s funny, I didn’t even notice you had braces when I met you, seriously. And I consider myself a pretty observant person. Thanks for sharing your blog, it’s great."

This is coupled with another compliment I received while having a conversation with a friend of my sister in law's in Florida. He said to me, apropos of some cultural reference, "You might be too young to remember that--are you even 30 years old yet?" On the heels of my last birthday, I threw back my head in laughter and raised up my arms in victory! Woo hoo!

Both of these sentiments have only served to strengthen the feeling I've had very recently that I need to believe that the braces are no big deal. Shoot, if no one is noticing them, then why am I paying so much mind to them? I'm done with all this. I'm tired of keeping myself on the sidelines. I want in the game and I want to be in it now.

The braces get tightened on Friday. Let's hope that this gladiator-like resolve sticks with me through that. The true test is to be found then.

It seems only fair that I should give a shout out to my California friend's blog, especially her latest entry. It's fantastic, especially for all you book lovers out there!

http://borrowedboughtstolen.blogspot.com/2011/02/organizing-bookcase.html

Enjoy!

A: Alligators All Around

For those of you who read the blog, you've noticed that I've paid special attention when animals come into my my life in a new or unusual way. Alligators/crocodiles have been following me lately--I saw many in Costa Rica in December, and this past weekend, I was face to face with this fellow in the Florida Everglades:

And saw all of these from above:

And my brother and sister in law got me a whole set of Lacoste towels for my birthday (whose logo is, of course, an crocodile). Color? Alligator green, of course!

I read online that Alligators symbolize "the beginning of a new period and the death of the old. Knowledge is transformed by a new level of growth, hidden wisdom awaits. Alligator can teach you ancient knowledge that is currently hidden and gives strength to create your own opportunities. These guardians and protectors of wisdom will show how to move in the waters of the Self. Are you seeing things as they are and not what they appear to be? Are you consumed by the knowledge you are becoming unbalanced with meditation and quiet time? Alligator's breathing awareness will help in balancing out transformations."

Hmm. I do suppose I've been transforming for the past year and a half, certainly. The teeth are merely the most outward and obvious example of this. I do feel that Spring is coming despite forecasts of yet more snowstorms. I saw crocuses being sold for the first time today being sold in my local shop. I can feel warmth in the air despite the wind. I'm so deliciously curious to see what's going to happen in the coming months. If it's half as beautiful as these Spring photos, I'll consider myself lucky.

38 Special

So.

Another birthday has come and gone and that leaves me at 38. People scoff and tell me it's not old. And yet, Andy Pettitte announced his retirement from the Yankees this week. At age 38.

I had a good birthday. I went to a yoga class that was wonderfully challenging. I had brunch with Katina and Alicia and could eat salad for the first time in months. (Hurrah!) I had afternoon "tea" consisting of a pizza with Kristin and her beautiful new dachshund George. (Whom I affectionately have dubbed "Chicken Wing.") She outfitted me in a hot, black lace dress and we went to the French Culinary Institute for dinner with a bunch of friends. I am still dreaming of the chocolate hazelnut cake with earl grey tea ice cream. That was the best part of the whole five course meal. (That, and the free glass of Moscato d'Asti as a gift from the waiter!) Here, have a look:

Fish Course:

Lobster Course:

Digestive Course--the best vanilla poached pears with arugula and goat cheese sorbet.

Duck Course:

Happy birthday, of course!

(It was a hazelnut gianduja cake with earl grey tea ice cream. C'etait parfait!)

Thanks to Brad for being the official cruise photographer! And for everyone who made me feel so special!

Wonderland

I watched The Biggest Loser the other night for the first time in months. One of the contestants used the phrase that she is now in "One"-derland, going below 200 pounds and being in the 100s. I suppose I too am in "one"derland with 192 days to go. I am cautiously optimistic that this is indeed accurate. Fingers crossed, everyone.

I've spent the last week in Los Angeles, mostly for work, but got stranded there for the last day and a half due to weather. Most who attended my conference didn't get out when they were supposed to, and images of snow ravaged Oklahoma and ice covered New York kept me glued to the Weather Channel.

It was cold for SoCal--50s and 60s. I had been expecting much warmer temps and was not properly attired, so I made good use of the hotel gym to warm my internal temperature, waking up each morning at 4:15 am and running for a half an hour. I was usually the only woman in a room full of men at that time (There was a fitness conference going on at the same time as mine.) I doubled my running time within 4 days, and I was averaging a 13 minute mile. (J-Bird! How do you like them apples?) I still ache, but it's such a good ache, and I can't wait to join the Y located up the street with it's gorgeous, freshly built track!

My dedication to running surprised me, as did the fact that no one, no one, no one batted an eyelash at my braces the way they do here. In fact, I was hit on, rather persistently, by a cynical Chicagoan, and was pimped out by a woman at the conference from Utah who immediately deemed me "a catch" and was determined to set me up with a pal of hers in Atlanta. My friend Linda says that everyone in LA wears braces and that evening alone she counted 5 people who had them. I started my own experiment of counting dental offices and there they were, literally on every block, just like Starbuck's franchises are here in NYC. For the first time in 17 months, I truly felt like I belonged.

Talk about Wonderland. Curiouser and curiouser!